And we're back from our day off! Toritori here to kick off another awesome double-barrelled update!!
Huh? What? Gah, I haven't saved yet, oh whatever. It's Kiba. I'm kinda busy here so if you don't mind...
So yeah, we're back from our break from conducting that wonderful interview with our very own boss Aya Shameimaru the last time. She wasn't exactly pleased that we didn't accept her recommendations, but decided to give it a pass anyway "in the name of free speech and journalistic integrity, as expected of the pure and honest Shameimaru!" Oh, whatever. And she also said that as part of a deal for giving us a day off we have to say "Subscribe to Bunbunmaru News" or something like that.
Shh! Do you want Reimu Hakurei to throw that "No Newspaper Subscription Solicitations" sign at us aga... ARGH!!!
Oh... well, it seems Kiba is a little occupied for now trying to make sure he didn't lose his data on his SlayStation Portable after that giant sign landed on it. So on with the news! Today, we caught up with Gensokyo Island's newest resident, Mokou Fujiwara, plying her wares at the fountain. No, not like that, I meant...
It's totally canon for her to be selling food from a stall. And yes, she has a killer's eyes, it's intentional.
It looks like Mokou was selling her special delicacy guaranteed to inflict stomach-churningly agonisingly torturous cramps (an eternal lifetime of toilet turmoil, guaranteed), which was not for sale to anyone except Kaguya Houraisan, for whom it would be absolutely free.
That's... favouritism right there. Even Okuu's Look-alike didn't get one of them. When pressed for a comment on the matter, Mokou very generously told us to go get "@#$%^&"ed which apparently was a secret code to get "Kaguya over here so I can get her satiat"ed. It's good to know that our newest islander is someone with such strong emotions about sharing with others.
Speaking of new islanders, more progress on the baby front as new proposals were made to augment the "infant"ry. Get it? Haha... well, actually I'm not kidding. According to very reliable sources (actually, Kiba's research) I've heard that the world's strongest soldier might be on the verge of joining this island's ranks.
And his parents are a dog and a fairy, go figure.
Um, Kiba, I think you've got your references wrong. It seems that Tia Arlert and Tadakichi Mihama decided to name their second child not after that fellow from Attack on Titan, but rather after another famous designer. I bet they think he has some great jeans... uh, I meant genes. But I do agree that it's really troublesome how so many people have the same name that they get confused for each other all the time. Maybe they should Levi a tax on reusing names.
Oh yeah, on that note about Attack on Titan, that cute clever clogs from that series, Armin Arlert, was also proudly showing off his wife Recette Lemongrass' newest child. It seems that Armin has taken all his training to heart, as he decided to name his fourth child and second daughter Skylar. He's confident that she can be the very best, or at least maybe be fit to run a gym sometime in the future.
I can't believe this is actually a random name in the database. In fact, I'm absolutely blown away.
Well, it's unfortunate that we have to bring young Skylar's dreams down to earth, especially since she will inevitably be catapulted off the island to find her own path as a traveller, since her big sister Tia has already taken the sole place reserved for the offspring of each coupling. Still, with all the Pokémon masters on this island, we're confident Skylar will find Gensokyo Island an excellent launchpad from which to take flight.
And that very conveniently brings us to the last note for today, as a couple of express mail delivery ships pulled up at the port to deliver us notifications of how Gensokyo Island's young travellers have been doing in the outside world. In fact, one of those letters was addressed to the maritime maniac and Pokémon pariah, Archibald Aqua, and his wife Margit Ravelli.
The pair was in for a pleasant surprise, as the letter was from their eldest child and first daughter Shelly, and this was the first time she had ever wrote back to her parents signalling that she was still alive. Naturally, they were absolutely thrilled since Shelly was the only one of their children who had the opportunity to leave Gensokyo Island, with the other two, Rafa and Matthias still languishing at the port and mooching off their parents.
Arachnophobes look away now... oops, too late, hahaha. See, there's a multi-legged crawling creature under Rinko's deckchair!
Shelly, who was writing back from Hamu Rabu Island (Ham love? Hamster rubbing? Who knows?), was unfortunately not permitted to send back a photograph of the island's residents. No doubt they were probably engaged in some sort of secret, grotesque ritual involving ham rubbing or hamster loving which the island's owner didn't want leaked to the press. Censorship is a harsh mistress. But Shelly's still alive, and that's all the matters to her proud parents Archie and Margit.
In the meantime, Utsuho Reiuji and Rinnosuke Morichika received a cheeky letter from their third child and second daughter Rinko, who had dropped by for a visit a few days ago. It seems Rinko just wanted to let them know that she was trapped in the middle of nowhere, and that she wasn't dead, so please keep sending money, dear parents! The heck, my parents don't send me anything! And I wouldn't be surprised if Rinko's parents don't send her a thing either, heh.
So that's it for now! We've just received a notification from our boss Aya Shameimaru that while we were dawdling around here she went and updated the lists on the Miis and QR codes page, whatever that is, and now featuring her wonderful likeness as would only be natural for the best Touhou Project character ever. Uh... yeah, okay.
And also, another message that she asked me to read out. It says... "Subscribe to Bunbunmaru News today!" Um, is it really a good idea to ...
"SPELL CARD! Talisman: Exorcism of the Newspaper Subscription Solicitors!"
... ouch... am I entitled to claim workman's compensation for these injuries?
... what about my SlayStation Portable! It had four million hours of save data! Oh wait, that's Overlord Mao's save file... well, that's gone too...
So... um ... how about it?
These Health and Safety regulations are going too far. You can't even consume a sports drink any more.
BUNBUNMARU UPDATES, 27th February 2015
Children
Levi was born to Tia Arlert and Tadakichi Mihama. It's their second child! He is an Easygoing Buddy.
Gensokyo Gourmands
Shou Toramaru tried a Sports Drink today. She thought it was the Worst Ever!
BUNBUNMARU UPDATES, 28th February 2015
Traveller Updates
Shelly, daughter of Margit Ravelli and Archibald Aqua, wrote back from Hamu Rabu Island! She has visited 1 island so far.
Rinko, daughter of Utsuho Reiuji and Rinnosuke Morichika, wrote back from Streetpass Relay Point Island! She has visited 2 islands so far.
Children
Skylar was born to Recette Lemongrass and Armin Arlert. It's their fourth child! She is an Easygoing Dreamer.
Desco Kazamatsuri announced that she was pregnant with her and Mitsukuni Haninozuka's first child!
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