It would really be quite a shame to be missing a great time like this because of a tantrum. After all, back home when I was growing up, my favourite hobby around times like this was trotting on down to the fountain to observe the peasants... I mean, the other islanders setting up stalls for the seasonal carnival.
W... what do you mean I got the wrong season? If I get one of the three foods remaining it's a holiday any how!
Hmm, let me ponder... what other things seem far more fun during summer than during any other season? Ah, I know! Paying a visit to your local oceanarium is one of them. After all, it's just that perfect time of the year when the salty spray of the sea feels so cooling, while the ocean breezes are balmy enough to be comforting. In another other season, it's either miserably cold or just too rainy to be out, appreciating the beauty of nature at million-dollar man-made establishments dedicated to showcasing its multifarious wonders.
Gensokyo Island may not actually have an oceanarium, the closest we have is a certain ocean fanatic and retired supervillain who once dreamt of accelerating global warming to raise the sea levels. Instead, it does have a veritable menagerie of many other weird and wonderful creatures. From the more pedestrian like dogs, cats, crows, and insects, to the exotic like tigers, werewolves, phoenixes, and eldritch spawn, all of them can be encountered in an average day walking through the zoological smorgasbord that is Mii Apartments.
And no, Yuyuko, dressing up as a walrus is not going to get people to feed you fish. We're not that easily fooled.
But yes, Okuu's Look-alike has been looking very different than usual. Being the island's supreme dictator, I thought she bore the trials of Gensokyo Island's slippage into the sands of time with a certain level of dignity and even leadership, considering the decisive actions that needed to be done to keep the island from falling into a state of eternal tedium. And yet now... those narrowed eyes and distrusting sideways glances, what could have happened?
Hmm, perhaps this could be related to one of the occasional genuinely serious pieces of news that has been relayed over the crowdfunded Mii News network here on Gensokyo Island over the last few days. Apparently, a certain infamous child predator has been charged with mailing lewd and distressing videos of himself to the residents of Gensokyo Island. Within this videos, he has filmed himself performing everyday activities... which are now immediately declared obscene because he, a known child predator, stars in them! How filthsome!
It wouldn't be surprising that Okuu's Look-alike was targeted by him as well, along with the other islanders, given that she only has the mind of a child. Kind of like someone under Age-o-matic spray. Let us only hope that this certain infamous villain will soon be brought to justice and made to pay for his crimes against common sensibility and decency.
Next, on Gensokyo Island's Most Grotesque Home Videos, Mister Kimura makes "Chicken Noodle Soup" with his *censored*.
No? It appears that Mister Kimura's actions weren't the cause of this summer of discontent. Hmm... I think I've nailed it down now. I believe that what Okuu's Look-alike really wants most is a vacation.. Which could explain why she simply isn't willing to spend about 40 Travel Tickets or enough Miibucks to take a trip into space 25 times over. And recent attempts by other resiednts of Gensokyo Island to get her to part with the pretties has not only been ignored, but has driven Okuu's Look-alike in a state of near rage at the ceaseless and unfulfillable demands of her ungrateful minions.
After all, the residents of Gensokyo Island appear to have settled on the most efficient tactic for extorting a Travel Ticket out of Okuu's Look-alike, and that's for married couples with kids to randomly decrease relations with each other as low as they can go and threaten to break up, and demand a Travel Ticket as a sort of bribe to postpone any possible divorce proceedings. Because they know that Okuu's Look-alike will, under no circumstances whatsoever, tolerate the breakup of a marriage which has produced any children at all. And also because, as we all know, it is perfectly logical that a marriage has an equal chance of breaking up as it does of happily continuing every day.
Minamitsu Murasa and Aliasse Foerster pull off the Travel Ticket scam. What's that, swindle the evil dictator? I'd like that.
Apparently, these schemes have become rife in the wake of the time-space continuum disaster for Gensokyo Island - it must have been some kind of fad which has imported itself from the future or something. But it is certainly troubling Okuu's Look-alike to no end, now, she won't even hand out a Travel Ticket to anyone unless a pair of islanders blackmail her into doing so by pulling off the scam... which is hardly a way of discouraging the practice, when you stop and think about it. But such has become the way of things on Gensokyo Island at the moment.
Ah, how could we address this problem? Maybe if Okuu's Look-alike reinvested all those funds saved up from developing Gensokyo Island and instead put them into building some more interesting tourist attractions like an oceanarium, or maybe an airstrip to let the residents here take a holiday any time they like - on their own expense, of course. Or perhaps the denizens of Gensokyo Island could actually learn to treat their loved ones with a modicum of respect... haha, respect, what's that? Clearly the only thing that talks in this world is money, and anyone who thinks otherwise is a damned naïve fool.
BUNBUNMARU UPDATES, 11th June 2015
BUNBUNMARU UPDATES, 12th June 2015
BUNBUNMARU UPDATES, 13th June 2015
Relationships and Marriage
Rin Kaenbyou and Suika Ibuki became Best Friends!
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