We gave him a break, remember? Since Aya Shameimaru's off on maternity leave, we put him down for an assignment with the promise of letting him cool his head after that.
Yes, that's right... you know, Toritori, I think you may be letting all that power get to your head.
What, me? Obsessed with power? No way! I'm just making the most of my remaining time on the island before I finally head back off into the wild unknown, and if it means making use of my position to fiddle around with hapless newfaces for laughs, sure I'd do it!
That's... kinda of what an abuse of power is all about, isn't it?
Believe me, Kiba, there's also a more practical reason for sending the new guy off on this mission. We've confirmed the end of the space-time anomaly with the data Okuu's Look-alike and the other mad scientists on this island have collected, but there have been some aftershocks. More specifically, there were two more ships that arrived from a distant land with very strange customs, and one of them contained an explorer...
Another traveller? So that makes five of us on this island at the moment. And did we have instructions to, um, 'get to know them'? In an intimate fashion?
It's probably best to wait for Aya to get back to make her decision on that, but that's why we sent Yugen to make the necessary preparations, just in case. Here's the dossier...
They speak English in what? Exotic Cuisine? What the... anyway have our Gensokyo Island specialty, Fish Poop!
Name... Rebecca... h, hey, is that blood on this folder?
Ah, maybe Yugen had an epic nosebleed after catching her in the bath. Or maybe she punched his lights out after she caught an amateur like him taking those snaps. She's quite a looker, don't you think so, Kiba?
Eh? No, not really. Nothing compares to 2D girls. 3D is merely a shadow of an ideal.
Ah, so that means I... that explains so much. Anyway, going back to all these snaps and the attached notes, it looks like she tried to gouge Okuu's Look-alike with the usual weird crap on a banana leaf, but for 5 Play Coins? And Okuu's Look-alike retaliated by bleaching, uh, I mean dyeing her hair blonde because goddamn blonde b@#$%&... ahem, because, blondes have more fun of course. Yes, that's right.
And it also says that she's from... United Kingdom? Do they even grow bananas there? How do you explain that weird-ass so-called Exotic Cuisine from a dull place like that?
Well, maybe it looks the same as the Exotic Cuisine from Japan, but instead of weird little fish, rice, and vegetables, it's actually kedgeree with piccalilli, toad in the hole, a dollop of haggis neeps and tatties, with Welsh rarebit on the side. On a banana leaf.
Somehow the bananas are the least exotic thing in that list. And I suppose she speaks in a funny British accent, too?
There's no way of knowing since there aren't any voice records included in here. But in any case, it would be hard to tell, considering that both of us speak in a funny British accent as well... Yes, that's right, we're actually Japanese people who live in America who speak with British accents. Somehow I just can't wrap my head around it...
Toritori, what did Okuu's Look-alike tell you about ramming your face in the fourth wall? It tends to hurt after a while.
Ack, that's absolutely right.
A snap with the star of Gensokyo Island. That's right, a Japanese Viking... who lives in America and speaks with a British accent.
So, we've got the inside scoop, suitably compromising photographs, and a DNA sample. But we're not actually going to rope this girl in unless Aya tells us to do so?
That's right. Gotta have a superior to blame during the war crimes tribunal, y'know.
I wonder how she's doing, off on maternity leave. It's her sixth kid, isn't it?
That's right. Funnily enough, as an expert photographer and investigative journalist herself she thought of us earlier and sent us a photograph of her new bundle of tigerflesh, along with some other newsworthy pics she managed to get while at it.
The floodgates are open once again. Can nothing stem the advancing tide of baby flesh?
Niitaka, huh? What an unusual name that doesn't really fit the typical name scheme. It sounds like another of those weird samurai names, but then not really, and why would Aya and her husband Shou Toramaru be naming their kids after samurai, anyway?
Beats me. Hm, it looks like there's a note written next to it... "Tiger tiger tiger".What does that even mean? Um, well... I'm sure William Blake would be proud, at least. But wait, what's this other picture attached to it? Is that Rinnosuke Morichika announcing he and Utsuho Reiuji are having their ninth child?
What? That just came out of the sky! Nine? I was wondering if it was even possible to dethrone Reimu Hakurei and Junya Ohta as the king and queen of babymaking here on Gensokyo Island but apparently it is! Now that's a surprise!
I'm certain Kourin and Okuu must be on Cloud Nine after overtaking their rivals, at least. It is rather odd that the longest-married couple here on Gensokyo Island isn't also the couple with the most children. Maybe Reimu taking time off to pose with Rebecca in that other picture is what held them back. Or has ZUN been too busy coming up with some new Touhou game of legendary proportions?
New Touhou game? Nah, there's no way that would happen, because if it really was, by George, the whole of Gensokyo Island would be turned upside down in a flash.
You never know... ugh, I felt a little heady for a bit just there. Like all the blood's suddenly rushed to my head. Maybe it's time to take a break for now.
The face that ZUN will see every night if he doesn't make Sanae Kochiya playable in New Touhou Game.
BUNBUNMARU UPDATES, 22nd April 2015
Traveller Updates
A boat from Kira Island arrived. Fumiko departed.
A boat from Buxtonia Island arrived. Rebecca of Caldy Island alighted, Frederick departed.
Children
Niitaka was born to Aya Shameimaru and Shou Toramaru. It's their sixth child! He is an Indepedent Artist.
Rinnosuke Morichika announced that his wife Utsuho Reiuji was pregnant with their ninth child!
Gensokyo Gourmands
Kanako Yasaka tried a Lollipop today. It's her All-Time Favourite food!
BUNBUNMARU UPDATES, 23rd April 2015
Traveller Updates
Frederick, son of Recette Lemongrass and Armin Arlert, wrote back from Streetpass Relay Point Island! He has visited 0 islands so far.
Rafa, daughter of Margit Ravelli and Archibald Aqua, wrote back from Streetpass Relay Point Island! She has visited 1 island so far.
No comments:
Post a Comment